Encore of Revival: America, October 2, 2017

Eagles are attacking drones in Australia. So far, North American eagles don't seem interested... so far.

Several ratings are up: presidential polls, the Dow Jones, Hannity at 9 P.M., and an opposition senator in Alabama. NFL ratings, however, seem to be in severe decline. According to recent stats, the league's popularity fell by about half in the general public, but by more than half among Trump supporters.

The "kneeling players" don't seem to understand what they have gotten themselves into. They are not "bad" people. NFL dissidents do not generally begrudge the kneeling players as much as they begrudge the league. The nation is lucky that the US does not have a current formal declaration of war, lest protesting the US on foreign soil, namely Britain, be a "treasonous" offense. The players probably do not know that they are protesting the entire nation by not standing during a national anthem, nor about the legal meaning of protesting a nation's flag while in another nation.

Walter Williams says that the problem goes back to education. While he focuses on Blacks having been, more or less, "nannied" too much, education around the country has declined. Racism should be discussed. Most Whites agree. Whether this person or that person said, "Hands up, don't shoot," is a technical question of fact, not any view of the importance of the ongoing problem of racism. But, the American public has not been educated to know the difference. For more and more Americans, to deny "hands up don't shoot" in a specific situation means to deny that there is any issue of racism at all. Nothing could be farther from the truth. But, many people just don't know the difference. That is a failure in public education.

The NFL players should be educated about the meaning of their actions. They are genuinely asking for something good. Doing it in the wrong way was not their intent, but it was the wrong way. The responsibility belongs to the NFL. But, the league has allowed itself to get too involved in politics and not done enough to prevent controversy driven by confusion, the kneeling players being only the latest in a long slew of grievances with their viewer base.

There is opportunity for deep change in America, especially with the NFL. The league could get back to football and stop playing "politics". The players could be given a microphone and offered an alternate way to express their legitimate concerns. The country could clarify the truth about progress and "adaptive infections" where racism is concerned. Maybe the crisis in the NFL will initiate much needed conversation in America about many things, including thankfulness for a nation where those discussions can be held honestly. Whether the league chooses to save itself, however, is another question altogether.

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Faux Report

‘Howard The Duck’ Movie Coming In 2017; Will Be R-Rated, ‘Won’t Suck This Time’ Says Marvel


LOS ANGELES, California – 

Howard The Duck is a cult movie unlike most others, in the fact that almost everyone loathes it. The film, released in 1986, holds an ungodly low score of only 14% on RottenTomatoes, and most people consider it one of the worst movies of all time.

Despite that, though, Marvel has decided to green-light a remake of the film, which will introduce the anthropomorphic duck to a new audience, with hopes that the new film won’t “suck” as much as the original.

“Personally, I love the original, and I think it’s tons of fun. It’s not as good as the source material, but few things are,” said Bob Thomas, a movie reviewer for website TheFilmTalk. “Ed Gale, who played Howard, was tons of fun, and the movie is a laugh-riot. I don’t care what anyone says, the original does not suck.”

“The original is a giant pile of shit, but that won’t be the case with the remake,” said Marvel CEO Joel Miller. “We teased a bit after the credits of Guardians, but that was just a test, really. The character won’t be CGI, and there are some other changes. We’ll definitely have the crude, dirty parts of the comic, too. We are shooting for an R-rating, definitely.”

The movie has been in production since late 2015, but Marvel is just announcing the release this week. They say the script was written by Deadpool scribe Paul Wernick, and is being directed by Kevin Smith. Warwick Davis (Leprechaun, Willow) will be playing the title character.

Faux Report

Super Bowl 50 Garners Lowest TV Ratings In Event History

Nov 11, 2012; Charlotte, NC, USA; Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton (1) is hit as he throws a pass by Denver Broncos defensive end Derek Wolfe (95) and defensive end Robert Ayers (91) in the third quarter at Bank of America Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Bob Donnan-USA TODAY Sports

PHOENIX, Arizona –

Super Bowl 50 took place on Sunday evening, and chances are, you didn’t watch it. In the 50 years of the event’s history, and in the 38 that it has been broadcast on television, Sunday’s Super Bowl event garnered the lowest ratings ever. at only 2 million viewers. Normally the event would be seen by nearly 45 million people across the country.

“Basically, we think the two teams that played just weren’t cared about enough for people to watch,” said NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. “If the Patriots had been in the game, then people would have watched, if at least just to see them cheat and try and get away with it.”

Normally the show is a ratings powerhouse, if not for the sporting event itself, than for the commercials and halftime show.

“That, too, is dying out, because frankly, these companies release their commercials onto YouTube before the game actually happens, so people have already seen most of them,” said Joe Goldsmith, public relations manager for the NFL. “I have no idea why, since they spend 5 million-plus just to air them during the game. And don’t get me started on the halftime show. I mean, you watch men slamming into each other, rough-and-tumble, hell of a game, and then boom, halftime and we’re watching…Coldplay? I mean, who the hell books these things?”

Goodell says next year he will work hard to make sure teams people care about make it to the Super Bowl.

“Even if I have to come up with new rules or something, whatever I have to do to get real, worthwhile teams and players into the Super Bowl, I’ll do it,” said Goodell.