Faux Report

Jeff Sessions Arrested After Routine Traffic Stop Turns Up 20 Pounds of Marijuana In His Car



Attorney General Jeff Sessions was arrested today after police in Washington, D.C. pulled him over for a broken tail light, and found over 20 pounds of marijuana in the car.

Police say that during the stop, the officer smelled a “strong odor” of marijuana coming from inside the vehicle, and asked to search through the car. When Sessions refused, a K9 unit was called to the scene.

“Despite marijuana being legal in D.C., it is still not legal to use it while driving, or driving while impaired,” said Officer Thomas Townsend, who was the arresting officer at the scene. “After we determined that Mr. Sessions was actually using, we decided to search the vehicle. It was at that point that we found the bricks in his trunk.”

Sessions was arrested and brought to a local D.C. police department for processing, but was immediately released at order of President Trump.

“Despite the interference by the current Presidential administration, we will still be moving forward with the charges against Mr. Sessions,” said Officer Townsend.


Encore of Revival: America, December 4, 2017

Demagoguery hit the fan. It's never been more obvious. Reputable news sources—not the average British tabloids trying to tell Americans what to do—are rehashing old plays from the playbook: Congress is worried about the president saying things on Twitter. If the president doesn't obey someone he hired and can fire, now that's called "finding a loophole".

The president can say what he wants. The president can do what he wants in the White House without having to find loopholes. That's especially true with the village of cards Obama made with his executive orders that he knew would be so easily blown away by whoever the next guy was to take office. If Obama can create czars with no legal basis, the president should be allowed to talk to a White House staff member without getting permission.

But now, the Russianewsgategate scandal is making its full about turn, though the boomerang isn't quite back in hand yet. The DOJ oversees the FBI; Congress oversees both. Whatever—whatever—Congress says, the FBI and DOJ must do, including answer questions. It seems that they didn't answer questions. Congress is moving for contempt action, which isn't pretty. Though the president kept his peace, now the "directionless" special investigation is so obviously without good purpose that the president feels it's okay to say so.

The funny part is, had Jeff Sessions not caved into the anti-Trump pressure to recuse himself, he would be hit with the contempt action from Congress. But, he played by anti-Trump rules, so, ironically and poetically, Congressional action against a seemingly anti-Trump motive won't hurt him. Grab your popcorn. This will only get more entertaining.

continue reading